Online dating apps have been around for many years now, and have always been a bit controversial.
On one hand, dating apps are a great way to connect, meet and potentially date new people. There have been many success stories of people meeting on dating apps, getting married and having kids.
However, there is a dark side to dating apps. This includes the potential negative mental health effect, scams and the toxic hookup culture.
In this post, I share the 10 reasons why dating apps are toxic.
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10 Reasons Why Dating Apps Are Toxic
1. Competition
Since 75% of users on Tinder are male and many other dating apps are male dominated, this makes online dating super competitive for guys.
When you’re a guy on a dating app, it can be very challenging to connect with girls since there is so much competition. As a guy, you are constantly being compared to many other men, since dating apps have so many male users.
If you’re a guy talking to a girl on a dating app, there’s a good chance there are tons of other guys messaging her as well. This can make it very hard for some guys to develop a personal connection with a girl.
2. Dating Apps Are Addictive
One of the major issues that a lot of people have with online dating apps, is how addictive they are. Swiping and messaging your matches can become very addictive.
Online dating sites and apps have mastered getting their users hooked to their app. On Tinder, it will send you a notification saying you’ve got a new match, when in reality, this may not be exactly the case.
This will get you to open up the app, check your matches and begin swiping again.
After using dating apps for a while, some people become online daters. However, they don’t know how to approach someone in person. This can can cause dating app users to develop a dependence on the apps.
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3. Can Cause Self-Esteem Issues
Using dating apps can lead to low self-esteem. If you send someone a message and they don’t answer or if you’re not getting any matches, you can feel very bad about yourself.
Naturally, this can lead to body image issues as well as other mental health problems.
If you’re on dating apps and they make you feel down, there are some things to consider. When you’re on a dating app, there are thousands of other users.
This means that there will always be potential matches at the tip of your fingers. If someone doesn’t answer you or if you’re not getting matches, try not to worry. The right match will come along eventually.
4. Scammers and Promoters
One of the unfortunate sides of online dating, is that there are a lot of scammers. Scammers will create fake dating profiles and con people in to sending them money.
Although many people are aware of scammer on online dating apps, there are users who still get scammed all the time.
Another issue, is that there will be people promoting their OnlyFans or Instagram page. Although this isn’t a “scam”, it is a major reason why many people find dating apps toxic.
On the most part, those who use dating apps are looking for potential dates or a long-term relationship. However, when people use dating apps to promote their OnlyFans or to get more followers on social media, it ruins the purpose of online dating.
5. Hookup Culture
Dating apps can lead to a romantic relationship or they can lead to casual hookups. The issues with online dating, is that many people have poor communication skills and their intentions are unclear.
Sometimes two people will meet on a dating app and one person wants to date and the other person just wants to hookup. This is an unfortunate situation, because someone is going to get hurt emotionally.
Where this gets toxic, is when people lie about their intentions on dating apps. There are people who will pretend to be interested in a relationship and once they hookup, they will ghost the person and never talk to them again.
This can make someone feel very bad about themselves and feel like a “piece of meat”.
6. High Rejection Rates
On dating apps, naturally you’re going to face high rejection rates, which can have negative side effects for young men and young woman.
If you’re someone who struggles with body image issues and is insecure, signing up for dating apps can be a damaging mental health experience.
If you’re new to dating apps, you have to be ready to be rejected, left on read and ghosted. This is just a part of the way the online dating game works.
7. Users Can Be Rude and Offensive
Since you’re talking behind a screen on dating apps, some users will message things that they would not say in real life. Naturally, there will be people who will say offensive, rude and racist things.
This can lead to active users on dating apps feeling bad about their physical appearance, which can result in lower self-esteem and other mental health issues.
Many dating apps will try and ban those who display bad behavior on their apps. However, there are still many offensive messages that have ruined Tinder users experience as well as the user experience on other dating apps.
8. There are Always Other Options
When you use a dating app, you’re just another option. On these dating apps, if you say the wrong thing, take too long to answer or if you’re not attractive enough, your match can easily move on to the next person.
While using dating apps, there are thousands of potential partners at the tip of your finger. This is super toxic and can cause many trust issues in relationships that were formed on dating apps.
For example, if a couple is in a committed relationship and a little fight happens, instead of working it out, it’s super easy to rejoin the online dating world.
The bottom line is, that when you’re on dating apps, you’re just another option. If you’re messaging someone and they don’t answer, you have to remember that there are tons of other people messaging them as well.
This can make actually matching with the right person, a real challenge.
9. Weird People and Stalkers
On dating apps, there are tons of creeps, weird people and even stalkers.
There have been cases of young women having guys see them on a dating apps and then being messaged by the guy on social media, even when they don’t match.
One of the big reasons why there are way more men than women on dating apps, is because of the way women are treated. Many women have gotten creepy messages and inappropriate pictures from men on dating apps.
This obviously ruins the online dating experience for many women.
10. Untruthful People
Since online dating is so competitive and many people have high standards, there are a lot of untruthful people in the world of dating apps. There are users who lie about their profession, use old pictures or fake pictures and pretend to be someone they’re not.
In the last year, one of my good friends met a girl on Tinder and they hit it off. They planned to meet up for a first date and when my friend arrived, the girl look totally different from the way she looked in her pictures.
This really rubbed him the wrong way because the girl was pretending to be someone she was not.
When you meet someone organically in the real world, they can’t fake the way they look or their personality. This is one of the major downsides to using dating apps because you will never really know if the other person is lying, until you meet them.
At the end of the day, dating isn’t only about having looks and a successful career. However, lying about the way you look and what you do for a living is untruthful and makes the online dating space super toxic.
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Final Thoughts On Why Dating Apps Are Toxic
It’s no secret that there are both positives and negatives to using dating apps. What’s important is that if you plan on online dating, that you’re aware of the toxic elements of dating apps.
When it comes to dating apps, there are plenty of success stories, as well as horror stories. Online dating isn’t for everyone and it’s okay to prefer the traditional style of dating.
In this post, I shared the 10 reasons why dating apps are toxic.
Do you think dating apps are toxic? Please let me know in the comments below.